Off the Mark?

Ocean > Pond.

2010-09-19T19:50:00.001-07:00

I’m a Kansas-girl. I used to look out across land that is so flat you can practically see tomorrow coming. Mountains, obviously, were a big deal to me, the first time I encountered them. I remember when we first came over to New Zealand to tour the country and look for a place to settle down, going through areas like the Gorge, or even just Hibiscus Coast, where the roads are all over the place, going up and down hills and suddenly curving in a way that makes you wonder if the people who designed the road were just a little bit drunk at the time! Not to mention the altitude change! It was a big shock for a five-year-old.

The change in landscape wasn’t just limited to land itself. Growing up for the first five years of my life in a state in the middle of a very big country, I had never actually seen an ocean. Near the house I grew up in, we had a massive pond. It wasn’t a little perfect circle of water with a couple of goldfish in it. This thing divided our land from our neighbors’ in a couple of cases. My dad and uncle went fishing in it, and we have pictures of me holding up their catch of fish almost as tall as I was. I really want to make a point that this body of water wasn’t small, especially to tiny little me. At the time, I couldn’t imagine any bigger container of water. My experience was limited to my little inflatable paddling pool, the public pool by one of my friend’s house and this BIG pond.

So imagine the look on my face when we arrived in New Zealand, an island completely surrounded by not one, but TWO oceans! Standing on the beach, I was looking over the most water I had ever seen in my life. On the plane ride over, I had looked out the window and seen a vast amount of blue. Mom probably told me it was the ocean, but I had no comprehension about what that meant. To me, from so high above, it was simply a blue version of Kansas - flat and unmoving. But the ocean from the beach? That is a completely different story! Looking out to Rangitoto, a little volcano completely encircled by deep, vast water, my mind was blown.

Now, at the time, I probably didn’t show how impressed I was. In fact, to hide it, I would just continue my bratty ways, which is how Mom would certainly remember the experience. However, I would like to suggest that I have grown up since then. I would like to go public with this revelation: the ocean is WAY bigger than I could have imagined it! If we were to go out into space and look at Earth from an outsider’s perspective, I could point out Kansas to you. With a telescope and some effort I could point out the area that I lived in. But I admit it, I would have trouble finding that pond without a pretty high-powered telescope. To the opposite effect, I would also have trouble showing you all of the oceans at the same time. The pond that, in my experience was so massive, can’t even begin to compare with the ocean. Regina Spektor sings,
“Blue, the most human color,
Blue lips, blue veins,
Blue, the color of our planet from far, far away.”

The beach is now a place of refuge for me. I love the sound of the waves and their consistent crashing, even on a bad-tempered day. I like looking out and not being able to see where the water stops and the sky begins. More often than not, this scene always directs my attention to love. I want to avoid cheesy-ness in this part, so let the reader understand.

I would like to suggest that our experience of love is more limited than we think we know. We know love, even big love. Parents, best friends, lovers; depending on your life situation, but we all have people in our lives that have, at one point or on-going, showed us big love. It’s undeniable, it’s there. It’s big. Well, about as big as I thought that pond was before I met the ocean. Yeah, at the time, it was massive! And it’s still there, it still divides properties, it still has decent sized fish in it. But when I had an experience of the Love of G-d, my judgement of love had to evolve. The only difference between what I knew was big then, and what I know is big now is experience.

Listen carefully, I am not patronizing the love between parents and children, spouses or any other kind of relationship. However, in the same way that I cannot consider that pond to hold a candle to the massiveness of the water that covers 71% of our planet, we cannot consider that human love and G-d’s love are in the same weight class. Again, the difference is in experience. If you haven’t experienced G-d’s love, it will probably be a little difficult for you to understand what I’m getting at, so all I can encourage you to do is search. He isn’t hard to find, and He is quick to love. In a MASSIVE way!

Also, this hymn (and blog) is great: http://mybloginthenet.blogspot.com/2006/03/here-is-love-vast-as-ocean.html. Enjoy!

Small thought..

2010-02-05T23:20:00.000-08:00

I feel like I don’t talk about Jesus enough anymore.

Blogging is a sort of study... sort of...

2009-11-22T20:16:00.000-08:00

I have tried studying today. It’s not really something that comes very naturally to me. I’d much rather bake peppernuts, and talk about Thanksgiving and rationalize that there is far too much pounding from the deck building happening directly outside my room for me to concentrate. Apparently that is not completely true, no matter how much I want to believe it.

So I sat down and started reading through one of my history-help books. I got stuck on the third page when it was talking about Elizabeth’s reign. Many historians consider her reign from 1558-1603 to be characterized by her lack of decisions, rather than strong, confident leadership in the bad situations she encountered. On the surface, I would have to agree that it certainly looks that way. For Pete’s sake, Mary of Scots was a prisoner in her England for eighteen years. It was a tough situation, but it seems like Elizabeth’s answer was to simply not do anything - not return Mary to her throne, not kill her, not bring her to court, not marry her off. However, I can’t help but think that some of this indecision led to an end solution.

I especially have this notion with her decision not to marry or name an heir. Not knowing what to do, as it was an increasingly hard decision to make, Eliz. simply decided not to do anything. If she was unsure, she didn’t move forward. As a result, when a solution was demanded of her, she turned her seeming indecision into a confident, non-negotiable decision. When Parliament demanded that she chose I husband, she declared that she had — that she was married to England, as the Virgin Queen. She commissioned paintings to be done of her that reflected her in this supreme way.

However, her rule was not completely done this way. The decisions that had to be made that were less personal to her (in the way that they might not DIRECTLY influence her in the way that marriage or murder of a Queen would) where always made with great confidence. There were very astute laws that she passed, such as the Poor Laws of 1601 and at the very beginning of her reign she drew up a Religious Settlement that defines England even until today.

In looking at this history, I am finding a lot of myself. At the moment, we are selling our house in preparation for my parents moving down to Tauranga. I am currently actively looking for a job and a place to live, as I really want to stay in Auckland. However, if I can’t find the resources to stay, I will have to go down South with my ‘rents. I am giving it a lot of thought and some prayer. This is a big decision for me, one that will define the next part of my life. The answer is important. My indecision may lead to a decision I don’t want to make. I can’t help but wonder if this is how Elizabeth felt too.

Righteousness and Social Justice.

2009-09-09T03:55:00.000-07:00

This is part of an email I was sent tonight. Because I’ve been so busy lately, I haven’t had much mental space for blogging, but I did think this was worth posting:

Righteousness and Social Justice
One of the main themes of the Bible is righteousness. One dimension of righteousness is that we repent of our sins and do what is right. A parallel dimension of righteousness is that we are cleansed of guilt by the atoning blood of Yeshua (Jesus).
These two “halves” of righteousness can be seen in Abel, who was the first “righteous” man. He was righteous because of the blood sacrifices that he brought before God.

Hebrews 11:4 – By faith Abel offered to God a more excellent sacrifice than Cain, through which he obtained witness that he was righteous, God testifying of his gifts.
He was also righteous because of his good deeds.

I John 3:7, 12 – Let no one deceive you. He who does righteousness is righteous.
Cain was of the evil one and murdered his brother. Why did he murder his brother? Because his deeds were evil and his brother’s deeds were righteous.
We need to see both sides of righteousness. Believing in blood atonement without a demand for repentance and right actions is deception; attempting to do good deeds without the intervening grace of God is vain.

Righteousness also comes in a third dimension: social justice. Social justice is extremely important in the Bible, and is often ignored by modern preachers. Social justice is determined primarily by judges in the courts. The foundational rule of social justice is very simple: convict the wrongdoers and acquit the innocent.

Deuteronomy 25:1 – Approach the court that the judges will judge them. They will justify the righteous and condemn the wicked.

If the biblical principle of justice is so simple – convict the wrongdoers and acquit the innocent, so is the biblical principle of injustice simple as well: convict the innocent and acquit the wrongdoers.

Proverbs 17:15 – He who justifies the wicked, and he who condemns the righteous, both of them are an abomination of the Lord.

Moral justice is a foundation of the kingdom of God. David was chosen by God to be king, not only for his faith and psalm-writing, but for his righteousness in running the government.

II Samuel 8:15 – David ruled over all Israel and David did justice and righteousness for all his people.

The mistake can be made on either side. We can be too “light” on criminals, or we can be “condemning” of those who have not done wrong.

In Israel today, five major government leaders are under criminal charges: Former Prime Minister Olmert is being indicted; current foreign minister Liberman is under investigation; former president Katsav has been charged with sexual abuse; two cabinet members, Benizri and Hirshzorn, went to prison this week.

Some would say that the federal prosecutors are “head hunting,” trumping up charges to attack these leaders for political reasons. Others would say that corruption is finally being purged out of the government. In either case, a new “fear” of being caught for corruption is certainly spreading throughout the Israeli political system.

Igniter Media.

2009-05-24T21:17:00.000-07:00

Subscribe. They’ve got some really good stuff from both the comedy side and the serious.

Here’s a serious one:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xNLYW13177g

I think when we watch this video and also watch what’s happening to the world around us, it’s important to ask the question: “Who is this G-d that I serve?” There’s no denying that He’s real or that He’s in control. It’s not about how WE PERCEIVE G-d, it’s all about WHO HE REALLY IS.

Just a thought.

Righteousness.

2009-02-06T15:41:00.000-08:00

After a discussion about righteousness on Thursday, I felt the need to go look up the word to make sure I knew what I was talking about (actually a really good idea!).

Wikipedia was the first on the google search, and it came up with some interesting facts about the word. I learnt a few things, such as how righteousness is important to not only Christianity, but also to Judaism and Islam. “It is an attribute that implies that a person's actions are justified, and can have the connotation that the person has been "judged" or "reckoned" as leading a life that is pleasing to God.” I find it interesting that another god demands righteous living.

Also, there was a man called William Tyndale who came up with the word righteous from a previous, silly looking word that would take me forever to learn how to pronounce. In modern language it would mean something like, “rightwise” or “rightways”. I later looked up Tyndale on Wiki and he is pretty interesting himself. He came up with many “christianese” words and phrases such as: Jehovah (yes, I thought this was a Jewish word, but apparently not. Don’t tell the JWs...), atonement, scapegoat, passover, “let there be light”, “the powers that be”, “the salt of the earth” and my personal favorite; “the signs of the times” ( I have a thing for phrases that rhyme..) among others. In fact, check out his Wiki page: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Tyndale.

Anyways, as I was reading along, this line really hit me. “In the Book of Job the title character is introduced to us as a person who is "perfect" in righteousness. This does not mean that he is sinless."Perfect" in this sense means that his righteousness permeates every relationship of his life as his working principle.” For some reason, this brings the word a little closer to earth, a little easier to attain. So what does it mean to let righteousness permeate every relationship?

According to some concordance that Wiki found, it means “’tzedek’ —righteous, integrity, equity, justice, straightness. The root of tseh'-dek is tsaw-dak', —upright, just, straight, innocent, true, sincere. It is best understood as the product of upright, moral action in accordance with some form of divine plan.” Notice that this is what G-d was trying to achieve out of His people when he gave His Law. How can we separate the Old Testament laws with the New Testament’s teachings? It’s all trying to attain the same thing: Righteous living. Imagine if everyone lived this way!

So, basically, taking all that upright, innocent, true and sincere living, focusing and purposing it towards being just and full of integrity while going after the heart of G-d and following His plan and ta-da! Righteousness.

Easier said than done.

So how did Job do it? I don’t know. So I’m gonna go through Job and look for it and get back to you, but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t have the magical formula written in chapter something, verse whatever.

From another, just as important perspective, G-d is talked about as being righteous. (Nehemiah 9:8b “And you have fulfilled Your promise, for You are righteous.”) There is no way that we can call Him our saviour without Him being righteous. There’s no way we could trust Him to be a holy G-d if He wasn’t righteous.

He stands for justice - He is our Judge - He must be righteous.
He was punished even though he was innocent - They couldn’t find fault with Him (Mark 14:55) - He must be righteous.
He was filled with purpose and was following a Divine Plan - He must be righteous.
He is sincere in His love for people - He came to redeem sinners - He must be righteous.

I don’t know. There is so much more to say and discover and go through, but this blog will get insanely long if I keep going. Keep the interest up by googling “Righteousness” yourself! It shows many verses and perspectives. Wiki, as usual, has probably the best grip on explanations; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Righteousness. Job is my next stop.

2009-01-14T15:03:00.000-08:00

Q: What is your favorite Bible verse about worship and why?

As I started to think about that question that I will have to answer in front of people (gulp) in about 7 hours (double gulp), my first thought was the verse in Revelation 4:8 which says:

"And the four living creatures, each one of them having six wings, are full of eyes around and within; and day and night they do not cease to say, 'HOLY, HOLY, HOLY is THE LORD GOD, THE ALMIGHTY, WHO WAS AND IS AND WHO IS TO COME.'"

No jokes, that last part, in my Bible at least, is all in cap lock. Perhaps because it is important and therefore, needs to stand out a little more. Or perhaps, and this is just an idea of mine, these creatures are so big and so incredible that what they say can only be written in larger letters because their voices are booming across the heavens, and to make it smaller wouldn't accurately portray what is happening. Maybe both reasons are relevant.

But the part of this verse that has always stood out to me concentrates on the part that goes: "and day and night they do not cease to say..." They do not cease. As in, never ever forever. That means right now, while you're reading this on the computer, when you're on the bus going to that place you don't like, at 3am when you're asleep ((...well, when you probably should be asleep...)). When you're buying that cheeseburger for that homeless guy or when you're looking at stuff on the internet that you know you shouldn't. Before the throne of G-D, four weird and amazing creatures who can only be describe in similes that compare them with animals, with eyes that see everything around them and inside them are BOOMING; "HOLY, HOLY, HOLY IS THE LORD GOD, THE ALMIGHTY, WHO WAS AND WHO IS AND WHO IS TO COME."

Reading or hearing this can only make me think about the eternity that we're currently living in. And how G-d can see all of it spanning out, though it has no end, and no beginning for Him who created us. Actually, in all honesty, even that's too much for me to think about in detail. On a smaller scale I like to think about how there are always people praying, every minute across planet Earth. Because I know there are houses designed for 24/7 prayer in certain places ((www.fotb.com for more info)) I can be assured of this. Besides that, it is always daytime at some place on the planet, meaning the chances are higher for someone, somewhere to be praying, even while I'm sleeping. That thought alone is incredibly encouraging!! But then, when we read this verse in Revelation, and others like it that allude to the same thought, not only is there always someone communing with G-d somewhere on Earth, but there are creatures in Heaven who are also going at it with all their strange beings. There's the connection, "on Earth as it is in Heaven."

This piece of scripture speaks to me about worship because I believe that G-d is worthy of worship at all times, by everything. The most awesome worship is when everyone and everything is united and focused.

The next Hollywood block-buster thriller!

2008-12-18T01:53:00.000-08:00

After watching "The Happening" and pretty much hating it, I've found a better thriller story for Hollywood to produce. I can imagine it would be a hit! If only they could work in a clever joke about a pharmacy trip...haha.

1 Samuel 5 ((The Message-cuz it's good for storytelling plus some additional director thoughts by me...))

Threatened with Mass Death

((The opening scene. There has just been a major battle between Israel and the Philistines. You see the bodies of many men in armor laying on the ground through fog. Daunting music plays to show the audience that the battle did not go well for our friends.))

1-2 Once the Philistines had seized the Chest of God, they took it from Ebenezer to Ashdod, brought it into the shrine of Dagon, and placed it alongside the idol of Dagon.

((Camera angles up and follows a train of Philistine carrying the Ark up a dusty hill with some sad, Middle East sounding music in the background. Follows them into a temple of Dagon. Camera angles up on Dagon to show how they regard him with respect and think he's amazingly powerful. Music builds to a climax and suddenly cuts to the next scene, which may look like a party in the king's court or something. After all, they did just defeat Israel.))

3-5 Next morning when the citizens of Ashdod got up, they were shocked to find Dagon toppled from his place, flat on his face before the Chest of God. They picked him up and put him back where he belonged. ((May cut to a meeting with the priests, discussing the happening, but deciding it was just a fluke, just to take some artistic license and to make the movie last a bit longer...)) First thing the next morning they found him again, toppled and flat on his face before the Chest of God. Dagon's head and arms were broken off, strewn across the entrance. Only his torso was in one piece. (That's why even today, the priests of Dagon and visitors to the Dagon shrine in Ashdod avoid stepping on the threshold.)

((Rumbling noise is heard. Confusion all around. I'm thinking of clips kind of like from "The Prince of Egypt" when the plagues are happening, but with tumors and rats.))

6 God was hard on the citizens of Ashdod. He devastated them by hitting them with tumors. This happened in both the town and the surrounding neighborhoods. He let loose rats among them. Jumping from ships there, rats swarmed all over the city! And everyone was deathly afraid.

((Another long meeting of arguments among priests. Insert lots of shouting as some would have probably wanted to keep the Ark and try to persuade G-d to use His divine power against their enemies...after all, the Ark was pretty much housing an insane amount of power!))

7-8 When the leaders of Ashdod saw what was going on, they decided, "The chest of the god of Israel has got to go. We can't handle this, and neither can our god Dagon." They called together all the Philistine leaders and put it to them: "How can we get rid of the chest of the god of Israel?"

The leaders agreed: "Move it to Gath." So they moved the Chest of the God of Israel to Gath.

9 But as soon as they moved it there, God came down hard on that city, too. It was mass hysteria! He hit them with tumors. Tumors broke out on everyone in town, young and old.

((Same kind of thing again...))

10-12 So they sent the Chest of God on to Ekron, but as the Chest was being brought into town, the people shouted in protest, "You'll kill us all by bringing in this Chest of the God of Israel!" They called the Philistine leaders together and demanded, "Get it out of here, this Chest of the God of Israel. Send it back where it came from. We're threatened with mass death!" For everyone was scared to death when the Chest of God showed up. God was already coming down very hard on the place. Those who didn't die were hit with tumors. All over the city cries of pain and lament filled the air.

And in typical thriller style, you have the few who survive and start trying to mend their lives. The sun comes out as they hitch the Ark to some cows and send it away. I was trying to find an amazing plot twist, but to be honest, G-d is just too cool for that. Read chapter 6 for the sequel!! =).

Yes, you can quote me.

2008-12-07T22:45:00.000-08:00

Think about this: The Kingdom of G-d - "The extraordinary normality".

Yes, I can be deep. =).
I want to go camping.

Interesting.

2008-12-07T19:43:00.000-08:00

Well, I still haven't bought my MacJournal, so this blog is being written old-skool! =). ((But not as far back as to waste innocent trees and cramp up my hand...))

In addition to my summer reading I have decided to trek my way through 1st and 2nd Samuel and 1st and 2nd Kings. I started yesterday morning over breakfast, feeling slightly confused and cynical with myself about why I had chosen these particular books. Don't get me wrong, I totally love the stories and yes, I've been told they're more than just non-fiction stories-they have relevance to every day life. Uh huh. Well, let's see what we find then, aye?

To my surprise, I actually found something I thought was pretty profound! In the first chapter!

So, if you don't know, the first chapter of 'The First Book of Samuel' ((that's what my Bible calls it)) is about Elkanah and his two wives, Hannah and Peninnah ((are you seeing the same trend I'm seeinnah..)). Peninnah has tons of children; Hannah's womb has been closed. Peninnah chooses to be a [insert nasty word here] to Hannah because of her lack of children. That's the sitch.

So every year they travel as a family to the city to sacrifice animals and worship G-d ((they lived in the country)) and Hannah would get really depressed and wouldn't eat because this is when Peninnah would "provoke her bitterly to irritate her,"-1:6. Of course her hubby gets concerned and asks "Am I not better to you than ten sons?"-1:8. And at this point I'm thinking her husband is silly, not only for choosing to have two wives who obviously can't get along, but he asks silly questions too!

Anyways, we're getting to the profound bit...Hannah goes to the temple of the Lord to weep and pray because she wants a son so badly. Eli the priest comes and thinks she drunk, but she says she was just praying ((hmmm, why is it that everyone thinks Spirit-filled people are drunk? See Acts 2:13)). He apologizes and blesses her saying, "Go in peace; and may the G-d of Israel grant your petition that you have asked of Him." Then she goes and sleeps with her husband and nine months later has a baby whom she calls Samuel.

Okay, so after all that background, here's the cool bit. After Samuel has been weaned she takes him to the temple and gives him to the priest so he can grow up in the temple, worshiping G-d, just like she promised. And then in chapter 2 she has this amazing song of thanksgiving that has no bitterness or self pity in it. This is what struck me, she had a different agenda than what is obvious. If I was in her position, I would have gone and prayed for a child too, I may have even taken him to the temple for a little while, but all that would have been to prove my strength. 'I was a barren woman and now I have a child that I can rub in Peninnah's face because she was wrong about me.' or 'I prayed and G-d listened to me and gave me what I wanted so I could be restored in my family.'

However, Hannah caught on to something better than that. She wasn't trying to prove her strength, she was proving G-d's. That's the only conclusion I can come to when I see how she not only went to Him first, but offered her son, what she wanted most, her passion, her restoration, her everything to G-d. And then rejoiced about it. She rejoiced about the hardest thing a mother would ever have to do, because G-d got the glory. Interesting.

Why are Jewish laws so petty minded?

2008-11-24T15:47:00.000-08:00

Found this old email while cleaning out my inbox. I still think it's interesting!

Question:

Why does the Jewish religion seem to obsess over insignificant details? How much matza do we have to eat, which spoon did I use for milk and which for meat, what is the right way to tie my shoelaces? It seems to me that this misses the bigger picture by focusing on minutiae. Is this nitpicking what Jews call spirituality?

(I actually already sent you this question over a week ago and didn't receive a reply. Could it be that you have finally been asked a question that you can't answer?!)

Answer:

I never claimed to have all the answers. There are many questions that are beyond me. But it happens to be that I did answer your question, and you did get the answer. I sent a reply immediately. The fact that you didn't receive it is itself the answer to your question.

You see, I sent you a reply, but I wrote your email address leaving out the "dot" before the "com." I figured that you should still receive the email, because after all, it is only one little dot missing. I mean come on, it's not as if I wrote the wrong name or something drastic like that! Would anyone be so nitpicky as to differentiate between "yahoocom" and "yahoo.com"? Isn't it a bit ridiculous that you didn't get my email just because of a little dot?

No, it's not ridiculous. Because the dot is not just a dot. It represents something. That dot has meaning far beyond the pixels on the screen that form it. To me it may seem insignificant, but that is simply due to my ignorance of the ways of the internet. All I know is that with the dot, the message gets to the right destination; without it, the message is lost to oblivion.

Jewish practices have infinite depth. Each nuance and detail contains a world of symbolism. And every dot counts. When they are performed with precision, a spiritual vibration is emailed throughout the universe, all the way to G-d's inbox.

If you want to understand the symbolism of the dot, study I.T.

If you want to understand the symbolism of Judaism, study it.

- Rabbi Aron Moss teaches Kabbalah, Talmud and practical Judaism in Sydney, Australia.

- To view this article on the Web, or to post a comment, please click here: http://www.chabad.org/160998 .

L to the O to the V to the E.

2008-11-11T19:25:00.000-08:00

It’s funny where you get deep thoughts. Some people get them in the shower, some while they’re out on a walk. Today, mine happened while I was vacuuming the stairs...

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?”
-Matthew 5:43-46.

I was just vacuuming those stairs, thinking about the Suite Life of Zac and Cody ((Disney freak, I know...)) and about how in order to marry someone with children you’d have to also love the children ((if you don’t see where I’m getting this, don’t ask. It’s really not that important =). )). This was making me think about the different Greek meanings for love;

Eros (ἔρως érōs) is passionate love ((romantic)).
Philia (φιλία philía), which means friendship.
Agapē (ἀγάπη agápē) means a self-sacrificing, giving love to all--both friend and enemy.
Storge (στοργή storgē) means "affection" in modern Greek; it is natural affection, like that felt by parents for offspring.
Thelema (θέλημα thélēma) means "desire" in modern Greek; it is the desire to do something, to be occupied, to be in prominence.

As I was pondering this, a little thought dropped into my head. It was something like this: ‘How do you love your enemies?’.

First of all, who is my enemy? I thought Mom put it really well the other day ((and Mom, correct me if I’m wrong please)), she said something about an enemy being a person or group of people who aren’t looking for your best interest. Those who are wronging you or are putting you in a bad situation. When I think about enemies, I think of King David. All throughout the Psalms he’s saying things like, “My enemies have reproached me all day long; Those who deride me have used my name as a curse.” ((Psalm 102:8)) and “But my enemies are vigorous and strong ((or numerous)), And many are those who hate me wrongfully.” ((Psalm 38:19)).

So how are we meant to love them as Jesus requires? Wikipedia puts it down to agapē, a self sacrificing, giving kind of love. So what does the Bible say about this kind of love? I think you all know it and some could quote it back to me, but I’ll put it in here anyways. In fact, I’ll put it in a list to make later points easier. =).

        ❑        “Love is patient,
        ❑        love is kind
        ❑        and is not jealous;
        ❑        love does not brag
        ❑        and is not arrogant,
        ❑        does not act unbecomingly;
        ❑        it does not seek its own,
        ❑        is not provoked,
        ❑        does not take into account a wrong suffered,
        ❑        does not rejoice in unrighteousness,
        ❑        but rejoices with the truth;
        ❑        bears all things,
        ❑        believes all things,
        ❑        hopes all things,
        ❑        endures all things.
        ❑        Love never fails...”
- 1st Corinthians 13:4-8a.

Wow. How many of those can you really tick off and say you’ve done for that annoying girl at work or that teacher who ‘hates’ you? I always kind of thought that Jesus meant, ‘tolerate your enemies and pray that those that hate you have an okay day and don’t bother you.’ But I think what He is asking for is more self sacrificing and giving than that. It’s more than just giving them a brighter smile or being nice to them externally. It really has more to do with your inward feelings.

I’d encourage you to just look through that list, thinking about everyone that you encounter regularly in a week and maybe do some repenting. How well are we loving? If G-d truly is love, and we’re His disciples, trying to be more and more like Him every day, how well are we really doing? I think this is a major task, crucial to changing the culture around us, but it’s also one of the hardest things we can ever attempt to keep up. Love.

Please pray for elections!

2008-11-07T19:20:00.000-08:00

As you can see, I found my Photobooth application!!! And these are the only photos I have that are small enough to put into my MacJournal...

It’s about time that I wrote another blog I suppose. School is out and besides studying, which I’ve decided to officially put off until Monday ((probably won’t be the best decision of my life, but we’ll see how this one goes...)) I actually have no excuse not to.

Besides, today is an important day! Elections are happening in NZ. I haven’t posted anything about the US elections yet, but most of you who know me will know that I’m not very pleased with the way those turned out. And no, it is not because I’m a racist. I do not agree with most of Obama’s policies, especially on important issues such as abortion and civil unions. He is very liberal on these, hoping to make it legal in the USA for abortions at any stage in a pregnancy. Not only is this completely against what I believe about abortion being wrong, but it is also dangerous for the mother who may want an abortion at 7 months, and therefore a stupid thing to try and do. Besides that, I’m in the middle of a 40 day praying endeavor to end abortion in NZ, but also across the world. I know that this is on the Father’s heart, but obviously not on Obama’s.

And there have been weird theories going around about Obama being the anti-christ. These I cannot agree with, however I will agree that there are certain aspects about the campaign that prove how easily accepted it will be when he does come. These include how many people voted for him because of his charisma, instead of his policies; people fainted when he came on stage; how he captured the attention of everyone, not only in America, but also across the rest of the world and was well liked all across. Many of these things you can also look at Hitler and say he had, but he was not the anti-chirst, only a sort of prototype, if you will. BUT HEAR ME WHEN I SAY I’m not preaching doom and destruction because Obama got in. He may very well prove to be a fantastic president who brings peace and prosperity ((though I’m not denying that the anti-christ will also accomplish this. Check Revelation.)). In fact, I do really hope I’m am proved wrong in my thinking and that he will bring an end to abortion. After all, as my lovely mother pointed out the other day, G-d has changed the hearts of many kings, and He can do it again.

I think it’s important to remember through all this that G-d is ultimately the king. I declare Him King over my life and my country, because He deserves both of those and He is ultimately in control. And He’s the winning side. =).

Well, I wasn’t going to get into that, but now I have. =). I’m done now.

NZ elections should be interesting. I’ll probably turn on the news tonight and have a squiz at the polls. I have to say, I’m not as excited about these ones as the US ones. And I don’t think it’s an American thing, considering I’ve lived here for about 13 years now... No, it’s just that I’ve noticed that the campaigns here are so petty compared to there. Instead of having debates about important issues it seems to be more of a pigtail-pulling fest. But then, I can’t say I’ve been paying that much attention. Maybe because the US elections may have more effect on the world and this country than who comes into power here.

I don’t know. I really shouldn’t have started talking about politics because it always gets everyone ((including me)) all worked up. And that’s not what this blog is for. So I hope I haven’t offended anyone or too sorely pushed my beliefs on you. Though, I don’t apologize if I’ve made you think.. =).

Anybody else feel like watching “Scrubs“ right now?

Songs of Creation.

2008-11-03T01:26:00.000-08:00

Today I was contemplating how cool music is. I mean, not only do we have the ability to sing ((for better or worse)) as well as talk, but we can communicate through song, and not even have to use words. I was discussing this with Jenna and she pointed out another astounding thing: we have the ability to write songs. No matter what genre they end up being classified under, they are an expression on emotion and of our very souls.

When we just hum a random tune or make up a silly song ((as Zandri and Mum like to do that drives Tisha nuts... =). )) we are creating, just as G-d created. Obviously, His creations are a lot more amazing and intricate than we could ever create, but if you think about it, G-d created most things in our world, simply using his voice. He breathed stars. He spoke and waters subsided to show land. Physical things might not occur when we sing, but what we say can also bring life and can change situations for all those who choose to listen. I think it comes down to how we are created in G-d’s own image. It’s His creation creating on a smaller scale in the same way He did.

How special are we?!

Just trying out the MacJournal...

2008-11-02T02:23:00.000-08:00

I have about a 15 day trial with my MacJournal, so I’m excited! I’m not really sure why Mom didn’t think I should just buy it outright, considering I’m pretty sure I want it...but oh well. Why not go for the free stuff first?

Besides that note, all I really want to say in this test journal/hopefully a blog is that this past weekend has been amazing.
Let’s just say it involved Megazone, free breakfasts, op shopping, swimming, me overcoming a personal fear of cooking chicken, a birthday party, a fantastic movie, long sleepovers and calling some random phone number from a sim card in a phone we found at the deep end of Gfield pools.
Good people, good food, good times.
Lovely.

Let’s post this baby!

My late night Poalm

2008-10-29T03:59:00.000-07:00

Not really sure if this could be considered as good as a psalm. But it's not really good enough to just be a poem. So I call it a Poalm. Bear with me, it's late... =).

Go forth words of truth
Run speedily along the mountains
and down into the deepest valleys
Declare what the Lord has done.
Shout of His majesty and splendor
For who is like Him?
To whom shall we compare our G-d?
He is holy, without flaw.
His voice, His touch is enough
To heal a broken heart and mend a wounded spirit.
He alone is G-d.
For He alone is worthy.

Let the encouraging words come out
Oh, worshipers do not be silent
Those who love truth take a stand.
The time is coming for Justice to prevail.
And who can stand in It's way?
Who will dare defy what's right on that day?
No one can block His path, for He is already triumphant in His approach.
He has already won, though the war has barely begun.
And we will stand in the victor's circle, for we have already won.

Wow.

2008-09-28T02:30:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since my last proper blog, which I would count as the control one. I just re-read that blog and I decided I really like it. It has no comments though, making me think that no one's really been reading it, but oh well.

And this isn't really a proper blog. I can't say there's been any mind blowing thoughts going through my head tonight that has inspired me to log onto my blogger account. Really, I just wanted to change a bit of my layout. Sorry if you're disappointed...

But I can say that school is out for the next couple of weeks giving me some time and head space to think. So I guess I'll try and contemplate some big deal tomorrow while I'm spring cleaning my room. Wow, my room is in desperate need of a good clean. I'm getting ants even though there's no food for them to eat. Ew. I'm sure I'll find some interesting things tomorrow. Which is the only good thing about cleaning my room-besides the good feeling I get when the job is FINALLY done. It will take all day and maybe a bit of tomorrow, but it will get done, I will find some stuff I didn't know I'd been missing and I'll be able to sleep better tomorrow. Phew. Finally.

Oh, and one last thing. If you've got nothing important to do right now, or you want to procrastinate, and your name is NOT Dan Sheed, you should go check out Dan's blog: http://notjustatickettoheaven.blogspot.com and see his "Jesus is my friend." post. It will apparently change your life... =). Dan, if you're reading this, please do not get that song stuck in your head AGAIN! Haha. "He is like a mounty, he always gets his man..." NOOO!!!!

Death Penalty.

2008-09-15T02:20:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow I start another internal in English on Formal writing. It's on a very contriversal and difficult topic: The Death Penalty.

Because of it's contriversal nature I just had to stay up incredibly late ((even though the internal is first period tomorrow...)) and blog about some thoughts to do with the death penalty.

My first thought is about how death affects people. The way to get yourself a death sentancing from the court is to kill someone and live in a country like America, China or Nigeria. The idea of the Death Penalty is to bring a greater force of justice to those who have done the worst crimes. These crimes committed obviously affect the loved ones of the murdered person. This person is no longer around and has disappeared suddenly, without a sense of closure or a simple goodbye. This is a great injustice, and I agree that it should be judged. Hashly.

However, if you start thinking about it, the Death Penalty also affects the family of the murderer. First they are dragged through a grueling trial and sometimes a media frenzy, and then subjected to a sudden realisation that this person that they know and share memories ((good and bad)) with is also going to be killed. I think this is also a great injustice. They may have more of a chance of saying their goodbyes, but otherwise the outcome is the same. Someone else dies. Not just the victim/s, but also the addition of the murderer-turned-victim.

Some may say that this is justice. But if someone were to murder someone close to me and he was sentenced to die then this means that not only is my loved one dead, but some other human being. Who does his close person get to kill? It just seems to go on and on if you only look at it from a revengful point of view. As a follower of the King, I cannot agree with revenge, no matter how deserving of death someone is. Romans 12 speaks plainly about revenge-and how it doesn't belong to us humans, but the only truely just King. I believe that one day we will judge with Him. But it must be WITH Him. Right now most of our courts aren't under the leadership of our just and merciful G-d. Without Him we cannot possibly pass judgement on another human being and take their life.

This then makes me think of the alternative. Obviously you can't just let a murderer walk free if he isn't innocent. That would just be stupid. That's why we have prisons I suppose. To keep the bad people from the good.

To me it comes down to a respect for life. As a woman completely against abortion I cannot agree with the death penalty. Granted, these people have done something that deserves a great deal of judgement, where babies in the womb haven't had a chance to do anything at all except grow, and that's certainly not deserving of death. However, the respect for life should be the same. Our list of Human Rights states that we all have "a right to life" and "no one shall be subject to torture." Both abortion and the death penalty conflict these two basic but fundimental rights. Obviously the death pentalty kills people but it also tortures the individual both physically and phsycologically. Physically because of the brutal nature of executions and in the mind because of the long waiting game played in the cell. In some countries they won't tell the person that they are going to die until the day or within hours of the execution. Every day you wake up and wonder if it'll be the last day you'll be on this earth. It makes me feel sick to my stomache just thinking about it. That's not fair.

No matter how terrible the crime committed was you can't take away a human's rights. Who are you to decide when life should end? Granted, the murderer had to right to take another person's life and he/she crossed a clear line between right and wrong, but how can you do the same thing, make the same decision and call it lawful? It doesn't make sense!

It's getting really late and I'm not well, so I'll end it here with this really good youtube clip I found. It's funny that I can generally get more information off youtube than google these days!

Who has control.

2008-08-14T02:15:00.000-07:00

These will probably be loose, random thoughts.

I was walking to our school's Monday assembly the other day with a friend and I was in a pretty good mood. I mean, the sun was shining, the company was great and I had pushed all my stresses aside so I could have room to smile. As I was skipping along, probably greatly freaking my friend out, I stretched my fingers in front of me and admired. I love my hands most days. Even as I watch them now, furiously typing away, I love how long and slim they are, perfect for instruments, and just the way my purity rings sits. My nails are all peeled off ((it's been a rough week)), but who really notices your nails anyways? There's a little note written on my left hand reminding me I need to bring a sleeping bag and pillow to Dain's tomorrow night.

Anyways, I stretched out my fingers before me and simply admired, not only the prettiness, but just the movement. I flexed and clicked, probably grossing my friend out. I wiggled and stretched, flicked and shredded. It made me think about control. As a musician and blogger, I've taken pains at making sure I can utterly control my fingers to do anything they were designed to do. However, as I flexed and flicked, it occured to me that I wasn't really concentrating on making my fingers move. It was just kind of happening. Not in a seizure kind of way, but I wasn't consciously thinking, "move index finger right hand, now pinky finger left hand...etc" It was as easy and free as breathing. No real control.

In a way, yes, our brains are in control, reminding our hearts to beat, our lungs to fill with air, our eyelids to blink, but when you really think about it, that's so easily shut down. So fragile. It's not real control.

There was a great quote in the Matrix Reloaded about control. It's when Neo is talking to Councillor Hamann.
CH: "The power to give life-and the power to end it"
Neo: "We have the same power" ... "we control these machines, they don't control us"
CH: "Of course not, the idea is pure nonsence but it does make one wonder, what is control?"
Neo: "If we wanted we could shut these machines down."
CH: "Of course, that's it, you hit it! That's control, isn't it? If we wanted we could smash them to bits."

So, who really has control over our lives? I know the obvious answer everyone's probably thinking ((or maybe not, I don't know)) is G-d. And of course, he has the ultimate control. After all, He created the universe and set stars in their places! But the less obvious answer I think is you and me. After all, we're created in His image ((which is another mind blowing thought when you're staring at your hands)). We seem to think we have the power to give life and to end it. We do hold that power, though it's not ours to hold. Power and control are too big for us. It's like giving a toddler a lighter. It's potentially very dangerous. This is why abortion is such a big issue. It's a simple example of us humans thinking we deserve to have control over another life.

I'm finding it hard to end this one. I suppose I'll leave it open with these questions:

Who is in control of your life? Think outside the box.
Who should have control over your life?

Hmmm... =).

Food for thought...

2008-07-31T00:18:00.000-07:00

Here's something else for me to write about and procrastinate studying a little further...

Being saved doesn't make you a Christian.

Unfortunately the word "Christian" has been thrown around, dug in the dirt, trashed and sometimes put too high on a pedestal. One of my first publishes to this blog was a poem about being a Christian, and I still hold on to that as ringing true.

Being a Christian is not about being a better person. It's not about looking the best in a crowd. As D Sheed says, it's not just a ticket to heaven ((check out his blog, http://notjustatickettoheaven.blogspot.com)). It's certainly not a 'get out of jail free' card. Being a Christian should be about following Christ. That's why the 'Christ' part is in there. At the front of the word, no less.

Just because you've said a 'sinner's prayer' ((and I totally disagree with most of these because they're just one person repeating another person's prayer, which could be totally irrelevant to the new believer. Jesus said the truth would set us free, to believe and we would be saved.))
, doesn't make you a disciple. Just because you believe Jesus died to save you from yourself is not enough to be called a follower of him.

This is what Jesus had to say about it:
"If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate by comparison of his love for Me his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot by My disciple. Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple."
-Luke 14:25-27.

That was not the overly happy Jesus you saw on a picture on your Sunday School wall
talking. That was a commander and King.

I realise this is beginning to look a lot like my notes from Invasion last Tuesday...but it must be said.

Before you decide to convince your friends into this 'religion' or perhaps you're thinking of jumping in, yourself make sure you know what you're getting yourself into.

#Realise the cost. And there is a great cost, not just for those living in China or North Korea, although I'm sure they could tell you all about it. Think of what the 12 disciples had to give up to follow Jesus around.

#Be willing to hand things over.

#Be willing to surrender.

#Consider it a partnership, not just a one way love triangle...yeah, that one didn't work... =).

If you don't keep focused on the King, you'll burn out. Remember Peter stepping out of the boat to walk on water ((Matthew 14)).

Dan's questions that I wrote down ((because I'm basically just going from my Invasion notes now, haha.)):

# What do I want to be/achieve in the next 6 months...a year...a lifetime?
#Who is that ambition centered on?

Wow, I put a lot of bold stuff in there.
Cool.
BYE.

It's simply not fair.

2008-07-30T23:50:00.001-07:00

It's just not fair. There it sits. Right next to my computer that's on an incredibly messy desk stuffed with anything but study work. Begging to be charged and turned on. Tempting, testing.

Yes, I'm talking about my camera. It wants to be taken out for an adventure again, but I haven't had time, mainly because of school.

So I've decided to be incredibly brave and maybe take it to school tomorrow. I need to find a bag for it though, so it won't get wet.

Argh, something else to carry around. But hopefully it will be worth it.

Not that I have time to edit anything anyways. I still have two other adventure days I haven't even STARTED!!! Flip.

I can't wait to get out of school. I was talking to a year 13 on the bus home today and she thinks I should stick through one more year. It's like self inflicting torture on my self.

Maybe that a little melodramatic...but it is definitely getting to the point where I walk into school or a classroom and think, I love these people, there's nothing wrong with this teacher, but this next hour of sitting at a desk and faining interest in something I'm not interested in really seems like a waste of time.

When I could be at home or out on the street, seeing people I want to see and going places I actually want to go, taking photos or writing songs, making memories, doing SOMETHING!

But I suppose it's only one more year of waking up earlier than I consider necessary and doing pointless tasks all day. Time to make the most of it, I suppose.

Catch Up Time...

2008-07-18T17:58:00.001-07:00

Wow, so, I haven't blogged in forever. Which is kind of annoying. To me.

Anyways, I'm basically just procrastinating the assignment that I've been working on all holidays which is really, super, uber boring. If it was more exciting it probably would have been finished by now cuz it's not really that much work, it's just not enjoyable work. This is why I better figure out what I would enjoy to do as a job because, to be quite frank, if I don't enjoy it nothing will get done.

Oh, and this post will probably be all over the place because Mom got some really good Fair Trade Coffee and made me some this morning. And now I'm buzzing. Slightly.

A couple of posts down I wrote about some goals I had set for myself. I would just like to proudly say I've already achieved the little one about having a song by the next Open Mic Night. Which was last weekend. I think I'll call the song "Wherever You Are", but nothing's really been decided yet.

Mom and Dad bought some iPhones recently and are getting them working. They're really impressed. And I think I've finally slightly convinced Dad that I should have a Mac. Which, let's face it, I kinda do need in order to really work on my photography and music.

Speaking of photography, I have been wanting to work on more photos these holidays but we've had people over from America and I've had this music assignment to work on. Plus camp, which was AMAZING. So, in the end, I think I've worked on a grand total of two photos. One that I found out later I had already worked on. Good one, Sam.

Let's just say I can't wait for a holiday. I can't honestly say I've really had one since the summer. Oh, I miss summer. We went to the Coromandel earlier this week and I fell in love with it again. So, I've decided to roadtrip up there this summer-near Christmas so hardly any of the tourists will be there. And now that's all I can think about, planning out my summer. Which is another five months away. After another term of school and a whole bunch of exams. It's like the light at the end of a very, very dark tunnel.

My Family!!

2008-07-06T18:59:00.000-07:00

Create your own family sticker graphic at pYzam.com

My Goals.

2008-06-21T16:50:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know, I'm beginning to look organized or something. Don't fear, if you take a quick glance inside my room you'll see I'm not really... =).

So yes, I have three new goals. Oddly enough, they aren't really short term or long term, they're just ranked on how big they are. I think this is so if I fail the two bigger ones I'll still feel like I've accomplished something.. =). Okay, here we go.

1.| Write a song and have it ready to perform by the next Open Mic Night. ((small))
2.| Write two or more songs and have them ready by the next Open Mic Night. ((Medium))
3.| Have a whole bunch of songs written by the summer holidays and convince someone nice and kind like Dan to record them along with some of Kimmy's and Tisha's so we can have a nice compilation of pretty songs. =). ((HUGE)).

So there they are. I hope all you motivational speakers out there are happy.

I am currently trying to write a song. So...maybe number one will be easier than I think. Maybe..

Today...

2008-06-07T04:22:00.000-07:00

...was incredible.

I went photoshooting with Dad at Milford and Taka. So much fun. I pretty much just want to be a photographer/singer/songwriter/generally creative person. That's what I'm doing with my life.

Here's three of my favourite shots from today:

Something I was Thinking About Tonight.

2008-05-30T03:24:00.000-07:00

"Blessed are those who are poor in Spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven".

A friend of mine remarked today about how lucky we are in New Zealand that there are so many Christians. I was thinking about this. Yes, we have a lot of "Christians" around us, and I suppose we could call ourselves blessed that so many people have "responded" to the gospel.

But I have a serious hunger ((and not just cuz I've been chewing gum all night...)). I have a hunger to see convicted, faith-filled, eyes on Jesus and Jesus alone people.

What we have is just not cutting it for me. I'm sick of two faced people. I'm going to be bold enough to say I'm sick of seeing two faced people that go to my "Christian" school. People that have all the right answers to all the safe questions but aren't living it outside the classroom. This reality doesn't fill me with satisfaction. It's not good enough. Sorry.

I truely believe a time is coming when God is going to do something massive, I don't know what, but it will heal all these broken hearts in our generation, the truth will be plain and unveiled and it will set people free. It'll be something bigger than church on a Sunday or youth group on a Tuesday. Wider than the doors of a church building. Bigger than a worship time or ministry time. It'll be something that takes it's place in the hearts of people our age and will literally change their lives, not just for a weekend or a month but for an eternity. Something that is tangible and will LAST.

Don't let this get past you: it IS coming. It's been promised. And G-d has NEVER failed on his promises.

So what are you gonna do to build this fire?

I'm calling you to pray. On your knees. I don't care that you don't have time. Make time. This is more important than NCEA. It's more important than sleep, food or sport. This can make an eternal difference.

Do it!

I Hate You, lol!

2008-05-28T23:57:00.000-07:00

What is with LOL? For all of you that have never seen this expression and have obviously been hiding under a rock with no cell phone or msn, myspace or skype, "lol" simply means "Laugh/ing Out Loud".

I'm no enemy to acronyms. You can say so much in a smaller amount of time with them! After all, IHOP is like a second home to me in America and you should see how many acronyms they use there! Obviously there's IHOP, then there's FSM, FMA, FSM, CEC and the list goes on.

But LOL is a totally different kind of acronym that's attacking this generation. Shaun and I just happen to be having an msn conversation about why people say things like LOL.

Shaun says hi, by the way. =).

I mean, most of the time that a kid my age would say LOL ((usually not in caps, but I have to make it stand out somehow...)) they aren't really laughing at all. Maybe there's a slight chuckle or a hint of a smile going on, but certainly no laughing out loud. Maybe these people are all just liars. Or perhaps, like how it is for so many of my girl friends, LOL has become the new way to put a comma in a sentence or a full stop while they're texting. So a conversation can sometimes go like this:

"Hey Sam lol wat r u up 2 2dae lol I'm getting my legs waxed lol"

For the moment I'll look past the other strikingly obvious grammatical wrong-doings of the text sentence and just focus on the LOLs. I mean, to be honest, I really don't find anything funny about greeting me. Or asking what I'm up to. There's nothing even particularly funny about getting your legs waxed ((unless of course you are a non-sporty guy that is having to have it done resulting from losing a bet or something...)). So why the heck would you put a LOL in there?!?! It's like saying:

"Hey Sam, hahahahahaha. What are you doing today? Hahahahahaha. I'm getting my legs waxed hahahahahahahahaha."

Where is the grammatical sense in that?

So Shaun and I have come up with a few other acronyms that will help you in your future text or msn conversations that will help you express how you're actually laughing. Enjoy. =).

LQTM = Laughing Quietly To Myself
CQTM = Chuckling Quietly To Myself
NLOL = Not Laughing Out Loud
NLOLBLQTM = Not Laughing Out Loud But Laughing Quietly To Myself ((personal favourite))

Or of course you could just say what you're actually doing without acronyms if you're an acronym hater.

Chuckle
Haha
Mwahaha
Bahaha
Cackle
Snort
Hardee Har Har ((very sarcastic. I like!))
Snigger
HA!

Be creative, come up with some yourself and feel how great it feels to truely express your laughing self to your friends and family.

Opps...

2008-05-26T00:17:00.000-07:00

I kinda forgot to finish off my America posts...there's sort of draft on Mom's computer, but I can't be bothered copying it. Sorry.

Long story short, I went to Mexico, it was amazing!!! and I can't wait to get back.

I wanted to blog about something a couple of days ago...but I forgot.

I'll make a list of things to blog about and stick it on my door. Promise.

I'm pretty much just on here because two of my very good friends just recently got blogs. Check them out! Dan: http://notjustatickettoheaven.blogspot.com/ Shaun: http://shaundedekind.blogspot.com/.

Seeya!

Episode 7.

2008-04-22T20:10:00.000-07:00

19th day. Seventh state: Kansas. Tuesday 22nd April.

I know, it's almost been a week. And so much has happened. And I have to wake up early tomorrow, so I should probably try and keep this as short as possible.

Since New Mexico where we had the Irwin Reunion ((which was pretty fun. Just more holding babies and chasing little four year olds and talking to people waaay older than me..)) we've arrived in Wichita, KS-the place of my birth. So I've finally been able to be around teenagers again! Yay!! It's been really good to see my friends again.

But of course they're in school, so during the day I've been with the rent's, running around doing random errands and seeing more people that I don't know/remember. Like today, we went to lunch with a whole bunch of rich people. A three course meal. Yeah. I was staring at the way she set the table and was trying to figure out the way that you use the utensils. In-out I think. Which really doesn't make any sense to me, because let's say you were setting out ten different sets of utensils ((which probably doesn't happen, but bear with me)). You'd have to keep reaching outwards to get your new fork. I think it would look better if it went out-in. But that's just my poor person's opinion.

Why do we even need more than one fork?! I could use a fork and knife for probably anything besides soup. Yes, I can even eat ice cream with a fork. Talent, I know.

Anyways, so I'm going to a catholic school tomorrow with my friends, Mike and Teresa. Should be interesting. =). And I'm staying with my friend Nicole. I tell you all their names cuz I expect you to be nice to them when they all come visit and invade our country.

They asked if we have gays or vegetarians in NZ. I said we shoot them. Truth, right? Haha. If only they knew what we did to vegans.. =).

Episode 6.

2008-04-17T16:42:00.000-07:00

Thirteenth day, sixth state?? Thursday 17th April.

So, I'm sitting here in the height of luxury ((not really...)) in the Homewood Suite Hilton hotel in Albuquerque, New Mexico! Mom's watching TV, Dad's doing something and I'm obviously on the computer.

Actually...I'm gonna go get dinner now. =).

Back.

Wow, what a strange experience! After just getting back from a dinner of over-cheesy macaroni and over-cooked dry chicken ((did I mention it was free!! =))) I kinda sorta had to go to the bathroom ((I don't know why I'm slightly embarrassed to admit this. After all, everyone does. That's one thing I don't understand when I go with my girl friends to the bathroom-as we do, in a group. Some of them turn on the tap before going into a stall because they don't want everyone to hear..you know. It's not like...oh-kay, going to stop now.)) and anyways, when I flushed, the water swirled anti-clockwise! I don't understand, at the last hotel I was at, it swirled clockwise ((I remembered cuz people are always asking me that when I get back from a visit from the states. People usually from the male side of the species.)). Now I'm confused. Which way is it supposed to swirl up here?!

Anywho...so this morning while we were still in Los Vegas, NEW MEXICO, we woke up, opened the curtains and SHA-BANG! It was snowing again! A lot harder than it was in Iowa. So it was kinda fun watching it as we drove with my grandparents for a few hours down to here in Albuquerque.

There's still not a huge amount to write about. We've been going to see people around the place that are my parent's good friends. So I can't wait to get to Wichita and see some of my friends for a change. We'll get there on the 20th, so it's only a few days to go. Meanwhile I'll be here in New Mexico meeting my family from my mom's side. I don't really know a lot of people besides my grandparents, and it's been really exciting to see my cousin Ivy for the first time in four years, especially because she's pregnant now, due in July. =).

If whoever is reading this could please pray for some friends of ours that we just saw the other day in Colorado, that would be fantastic. The guy has something that is kind of like MS, but the doctors can't really figure it out. They've been tossed around to different specialists all over the place for a few years now, but nothing is really helping. When you hear his and his wife's story, it kind of seems obvious ((at least maybe to me, and it's just my personal opinion)) that God is trying to do something here. But it needs prayer to come into action if you catch my drift. That would be cool. They are very good friends of my parents, and apparently they've known me forever.

Cool, anyways, I'm gonna watch TV or something now. Hey, it's not every day that you get good Cable! =).

Episode 5.

2008-04-13T09:18:00.000-07:00

Tenth full day?? Fourth state-Iowa. Sunday 13th April.

"Let it snow, let it snow, let it SNOW!!"

That's right, we have snow!!!! And I'm so incredibly excited about it!! While it was actually snowing last night I was just standing by the window watching it. So cool.

Anyways, we are now staying in my daddy's home town of Estherville ((ironic, I know!)) at a little motel that smells of insecticide/weed or something. We went to breakfast at the small town's cafe. It was just like you'd expect one of those small town eating places that you see in the movies, with the apparent owner running around with a coffee jug, telling jokes, the unexperienced waitress with a dozen earrings in her ears giving you that look that says, "I really don't care what you order, just hurry up and do it." Ha, yeah it wasn't that exaggerated, but you catch my drift. And it's one of those old school places that still let you smoke inside, wherever you want to sit. Needless to say, we ate pretty fast.

We're just waiting for Scott, Sara and crew to show up so we can go to the Good Samaritan resting home to have a big reunion with a whole bunch of people that I've probably never known unless they changed my diaper once when I was like, 3 months old. Oh yes, I'm totally going to remember you..mmm.

We're going to the rest home because that's where my Grandpa ((my dad's dad)) lives. He has dementia, so I don't think he's going to remember any of these people either. Maybe we'll just sit in a corner and play guitar together and play with Cole and Acca while we watch everyone else eat over-greasedified pizza. Well, that would be the ideal, except he doesn't really remember who I am either. I don't blame him though, he's 95 and we hardly ever came to visit when we were both younger. Especially after moving to NZ. I tell you, it's hard to live a life without regrets when your grandpa doesn't remember you.

But onwards and upwards! Dad's old best friend from the navy that he hasn't seen in something like 35 years is coming to visit with us tomorrow! I think that will be the highlight of Dad's trip in the least.

I'm really just hanging out until we get out of Iowa and go see my mom's parents. Out of everyone that I know and miss in this country, I miss my Grandpa Irwin the mostest. He's pretty much my favourite person in the world, and I haven't seen him in about two to three years.

Oh! Something else really cool happened yesterday, we got King Size packs of Reeses Peanut Butter Cups and the best part was, they hadn't melted at the bottom and gotten stuck to the paper. Sounds small, but little things can make the biggest difference.

That was my wisdom for today. Hope you enjoyed it. I'm gonna go read now to catch up on my English homework: Read "To Kill a Mocking Bird."

Episode 4.

2008-04-10T20:52:00.001-07:00

I'm losing count...is it like, the seventh day? Thursday 10th April.

Well, I've successfully been around babies all this week and not had to change one diaper!! =). I did have to help Mom bathe Cole and Acca last night when we were having dinner at Sara and Scott's mom's house. I bathed Cole and he gave me a shower in return. Oh yes, how I can't wait to have one of my own...hahaha. They are bundles of fun at the moment though. =).

I'm sitting at the table with a cat that has an inferiority complex. Lucy, she'll do pretty much anything to get you to pet her. Here's the picture I literally just took with Photobooth:

She's lovely.

Anyways, there's really not a huge amount more to report except that I'm discovering all over again that I shouldn't judge people and perhaps I should be a little bit more trusting to those that maybe deserve a little more than what I'm giving them. I listened to this week's podcast and it was really really super duper good. God was doing something in me even though I was listening to it over a computer with headphones on trying to block out all the noise from everywhere around me mainly to do with Acca.

Okay, well it's now past midnight and I've stayed up way too late AGAIN! If you could just do something for me...if you're reading this could you just chuck me a quick comment on myspace so that I know that someone is reading this?? I'm beginning to miss people, so I'm suddenly craving feedback.

And sorry if these are starting to get a bit boring. Nothing extremely exciting is going on here that I'm awake enough to blog about at this time of night. Even though I'm not fully over my jet-lag and that's why I'm still up... =).

Peace out, yo.

Episode 3.

2008-04-09T19:53:00.000-07:00

Sixth full day, still in Georgia. Wednesday 9th April 2008.

Sorry I haven't written in a few days. It's not been particularly busy, I just haven't had the chance to just sit down at a computer. I think the last time we chatted I was staying at Scott and Audrey and Cole's house. The day after, ((as you can probably tell from the last one)) Cole and I were taking pictures on the MAC computer with photobooth. Here's another one:

The rest of the day we just played around the house and chilled out. Not super productive, but it was really fun.

The next day we all went shopping at a bunch of outlet stores because Mom and I were running out of clothes..and then we went shopping again today at the Mall of Georgia-the second largest mall in the United States. Today was more prom dress shopping though. Yes, I did find a dress for this year that I'm pretty happy with. It's kind of a lightish orangeish color. Not really sure how else to put it.

Man my posture is getting bad!

So I'm now staying at Sara and Jason and Acca ((Ace-ah))'s house as of last night-which also includes their flatmate Marsh, three dogs and three cats. So it's pretty crazy. I'm still jet-lagged a bit which means we can all stay up late playing video games. =). We've been playing some band version of Guitar Hero. I can't remember the name. I might go play it after this blog and writing some emails. So instead of just having the guitar you can have vocals, drums and bass too. Yeah, I'm almost ashamed to say I play the bass. On easy. I tried drums and failed pretty bad. Bass truly IS only half a guitar! Haha. It's way easy.

Dad bought a new camera today, so I think I might be getting the old ((but still waaay more amazing than anything I could ever afford)) one. So be expecting more pictures soon. Sorry that I've been so slack about that. I actually don't think I'll be getting everything off until I get home.

Ahhh, home. It seems so far away. But unfortunately things still catch up with you. If you're reading this, I would certainly appreciate prayer. Don't cross me off the list just because I'm a billion gazillion miles away.

Anyways, I need to be doing something else. Like sleeping. That would be good.

Episode 2.

2008-04-06T17:00:00.000-07:00

I'm going to attempt to write this with people looking over my shoulder...MOM!

Third full day, third state of the trip. Sunday April 6th 2008.

Picture of the blog:

I left you yesterday morning when we were about to go out with Clela and Bohn. As I said, the only details I had remembered about our plan-making the night before was ''animals'' and ''food'' I think... Turns out we went to a hunting and outdoorsy store called Cabella's. It was an animal-lover-who-only-eats-vegetables-because-they-hate-killing-animals' worst nightmare. Oh yes, there were animals. Many, many animals. Stuffed animals. And not the cuddly type. The hahaha-I-hunted-you-down-and-killed-you-so-I-could-hang-you-on-a-wall type stuffed. Very cool. Haha, you thought I was so against it didn't you? Go on, admit it! But no, I didn't really mind.

Man, you guys would have absolutely loved this couple. Clela, for instance, has three piercings in her ears, a fake tattoo of the American flag on her arm and necklaces' and earrings with guns all over them. Not bad for a lady going on 90 years old!!

So after a small dinner of homemade burgers we waited for the airport van to come, which was late. After getting on the plane at about 11:00pm Arizona time, which was 2am Georgia time, we tried, and failed at getting to a proper sleep. So of course, when we arrived at Georgia's airport at about 6am Local Time, we were pretty sleep deprived. We immediately came here to my brother, Scott's house with Sara and Acca. We had breakfast and met Cole as well and yes, both Cole and Acca are absolutely adorable. =).

So, today was basically just desperate attempts at trying to stay awake and playing with cute babies. Good stuff. I'm not sure yet what the plan is for tomorrow, but I'll keep you posted when stuff happens. Or try to. Sorry for too busy days.

Episode 1.

2008-04-05T08:57:00.000-07:00

Second State, second full day. Saturday 5th April in Arizona.

We're in Arizona! Land of not much more than rocks and cacti. Giant cacti! I just came back from a complimentary breakfast from our hotel "Windmill Inns & Suites" where I had a small cinnamon roll, boiled egg, waffles and I have a banana that's not yet eaten. ((Didn't I say I'd keep you informed!!)) Previous to the waffles part, I had gone downstairs, after starting my blog off, for some of this extremely free breakfast, taken what I wanted, and came back up the shaky elevator that I don't know if I'll ever get into again or not cuz it sounds very much like it's breaking from above...and knocked on the door where I had the comfort of knowing that they were inside, awaiting my grand arrival. I knocked, I banged, I kicked. No response. So I sat by the door and waited, tapping from time to time. About 5 minutes later, Mom comes through the elevator and tells me they're both downstairs, making me waffles. As much as I wanted to finish this blog, I couldn't resist! And that's my story so far today.

So yes, as you can tell, we arrived safely. The plane rides were pretty casual. On the big flight over on Quantas I watched Juno, Enchanted, 27 Dresses and was most of the way through Sweeney Todd-The Demon Barber of Fleet Street ((and I know how that sounds. I wasn't having good thoughts about watching it either. I thought, I'll just see the beginning and if it's absolutely terrible, I won't pollute myself further. It turned out to be pretty good. And a musical!! What the heck!!!)) The plane from LAX to PHX I just read and slept. I'm pretty bad at trying to get over my jet-lag on the first day. But I had a good nights sleep on a wonderful double bed last night, so all is well.

Last night was real cool. I met my great-aunt and uncle Clela and Bohn. Very fun kids at heart. Clela used to shoot archery but had to stop at some point ((I was kinda sleepy last night, so excuse the lack of detail)) and so Bohn taught her to shoot guns! They brought these special guns that they use at the range out to show us. It reminded me of a rose. Beautiful, but you don't really touch it or you might get hurt! ((At this point I had a slight, probably healthy fear of guns)). Then they brought out the air pistols and taught us how to shoot-down the hall! They had a target set up there and we stood about 5ish meters away. I'm proud to say I got two out of three shot in the black bullseye even though I was about to collapse on the floor and sleep!

Just their house was like a museum to go through. There were pictures and awards everywhere and mounted heads of animals and stuffed pheasants. A little clock that whistles a tune every hour. Amway dolls. Giraffes ((Clela's thing)) and Bears ((Bohn's thing)).

Anywho, so we're going somewhere today. They told me, but I was just so tired that I've forgotten. Something about animals and the temperature is supposed to reach about 80*F ((26.667*C)). So that's not too bad. I'm used to it being hotter over here though. At least 90*F ((32.222*C)). Mom already thinks it's too hot but it's only 9:43am ((4:43am Sunday for you)) and so it hasn't quite warmed up yet!

Look out Josh and Jesse, you already have letters coming to you. From Mom. I don't wake up early enough to do letters AND myspace AND blog. So sorry. You're gonna regret asking for a letter everyday. She's serious about doing it! Mwahahaha.

Primal Night Rev.

2008-03-06T20:04:00.000-08:00

So let's talk about Jesus.

He wasn't always a humbled man you know. He was creator of the universe. > King. Pure power. Surrounded in Heaven by angels who literally never stopped giving Him praise. <...and day and night they do not cease to say, "Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God, the Almighty, who was and is and is to come." > Never. Stopped. Not even for a second. King above and beyond any king you've ever heard of. He literally had everything. Nothing was out of his reach.

Then came you. A human. A constant screw-up. A nobody. Fallen. >

He looked your way. He saw you. He fell in love. > He saw you for who you truely are. Not how everyone else sees you. Not your peers or your employee. Not how your family and close friends or your boyfriend or girlfriends see you. He saw right through your mask. Right past your armor. He saw you.

And He dropped EVERYTHING. The power, the angels' praise. A throne next to His Father who loved Him more than anything.

He dropped Heaven itself. For you.

Then He came to earth to pursue you. So he could relate to your problems and faults as a human, even though He had no fault just to show you how to be like Him. He did this so that, eventually, you would notice Him staring at you and want to talk to Him. Hang out with Him. Even go as far as to fall in love with Him the way He did with you.

He made you a promise. This insane God fell so hard for you that He promised to give up the one thing He had left. His life.

Let me tell you something about this God. He knows how to keep His promises. He never fails. He went out f His way to find the most brutal, slow, painful death in history just to show His undying love for you. At the same time ((a multi-tasking man?! He MUST be God!!)) He cleaned up the mess of a life you have. He gave you the chance for a second chance. No matter how perfect you think you might be, He is so much better. But in order for you to be with Him forever, you have to be like Him. Perfect. Holy. Without fault. Impossible.

So He gave a second promise. He wouldn't just give up His life. He would also come back, proving that noone can compete with His love. Not even Death.

And He kept His promises. He came back three days later. Meanwhile He was fighting whatever could hinder your love.

He fought for you.

Yet you still mess up. >
Yet He still fights and pleads for you. That's what He's doing now. <...yet He Himself bore the sin of many, And interceded for the transgressors. >
His love never dies. He proved that by dying and then coming back.

Notice Him.
Choose Him.
Love Him.
>

When Satan is knocking at your door, simply say, "Jesus, could You please get that for me?"

2008-03-04T01:29:00.000-08:00

Recent times haven't been so easy. It's hard when you have a very close friend in hospital, her very life hanging in a balance of whether she can handle the day in front of her or not. Mood swings can be hard to handle, but it's even harder to handle the looks on her family's faces as they have to deal with it closer to home. It's hard when your best friend's family is going through a bad spot also to do with illness and hardship and you can't ((and she can't)) do anything because they're in a different country. It's hard when you feel like you're failing math or some other subject that seems impossible and pointless and school seems like that horrid jail you're dragging your feet to every weekday with hardly a ray of sunlight in the sky.

Good is good.
All the time.
No matter your day ((that last paragraph has been my past couple of months in a nutshell...)), you're here. You're still alive. You have so much to be thankful for. No matter your situation. Just the fact that you're reading this blog proves that you have access to a computer, which is the base of civillisation as we know it ((at least from my point of view... haha =) )). God has truely blessed you, even if you haven't thought about it today. Even if you didn't ask for it.

If you've had a crap day go read some Psalms. They seem to help me. I love them. Haha.

I have more to say but Mom's egging me to get to sleep.

Realise how blessed you are!
((For more on that kind of subject, go check out Dan Sheed's blog on myspace. www.myspace.com/dansheed.

BYE.

Funny one-way msn conversation.

2008-02-16T02:01:00.000-08:00

You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:09 PM):
how are you sam?
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:10 PM):
sam!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:10 PM):
speak to me!!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:10 PM):
sa-ah -ammm.....
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:10 PM):
NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:11 PM):
im not going to lose you!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:11 PM):
not this time!!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:11 PM):
who knows CPR???
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:11 PM):
sam im going to have to give you mouth to mouth. dont take this the wrong way.. its in the name of LIFE!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:12 PM):
1..2..3.. BREATHE!!!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:12 PM):
BREATHE GIRL!!!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:12 PM):
LIVE!! I SAY LIVE!!!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:20 PM):
im going to switch accounts for a second. i need to check something. if youre not back by the time im back, why i aughta...!!!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:29 PM):
alright so now im back
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:29 PM):
where are you!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:30 PM):
iuasyghfasbhfiS;UFIAUA;IUF;kshfa;eruhfa
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:42 PM):
im beyond caring now san
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:42 PM):
sam
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:42 PM):
yes! SAN!!!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:42 PM):
ha!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:42 PM):
i guess ill see you tomorrow afternoon - saN
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:43 PM):
see you later, saN
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:43 PM):
hahahhahahahahaha!
You're a beautiful creation, no matter who you are! Molded in the image of a living and loving God says (10:43 PM):
SAN

My, How Things Change!

2008-01-23T16:47:00.000-08:00

It really is crazy how much life can change just over a summer. Your friends, your thoughts on life and/or God, what you want to do with your life. Pretty much everything. You can go from trusting how things are figuring out to worrying insanely about everything that's happening because it's going so fast.

I'm probably not making much sense. It's been a while since I last had an english class... =).

Let's just say that I'm finding this summer is going waay too fast and I'm finding it hard not to be constantly thinking and worrying about friends.

I need God's joy just to get through the day. He's so great at giving it too.

I'm really happy that it's P08 tomorrow!!

Shaun's Blog

2008-01-11T21:46:00.000-08:00

Hello Bloggers!

How is everyone doing? - English

hoe is almal doen? - Afrikaans

Wie tut jeder? - German

Comment est-ce que chacun va? - French

大家怎么样? - Chinese

Hope everyone has had good day. and God be with you all...

My name is Shaun.. like the title says.. and i'm sam's friend... i've known her for like um.. 11-12 years.. since i came to NZ from South Africa.. so yeah. i was born in RSA..

We go to Shore vineyard youth where we are recording a brand new awesome worship album.. so i'm in the control room right now. listening to sam singing... she has an amazing voice. did you know that?

So Yeah... hmm. what to right about..

current affairs. hmm

Edmund ilarry died like yesterday.. what the heck. 88 years old. i never actually new he was that old to start...

He's the man..

You can tell when someone is the man when whe they die they got the WHOLE hour of news dedicated to him.. it was sad and a celebration..

he New zeland cricket ODi team wore a blakc band on their sleeve playing Bangladesh today... we shall miss the man who conqoured the highest mountain and got put on the New Zealand five dollar bill... well he lived an amazing life.... so kudos to him...

hmmmmmm..

so yea... i think ill stop here.

Have a great day and my God bless you..

This is what I end up doing when I have nothing to do.

2008-01-11T21:36:00.000-08:00

101. Do you want to be in a relationship?
Nah man. I'm a nun for a year! Yay me.

100. What's your profile song and why?
Some song by Paperplain. Because I like her stuff.

99. Do you have a job?
No, but I'd like one.

98. What’s your favorite perfume/cologne?
I just like to smell nice, doesn't really matter what it's called.

97. Do you have a crush on someone?
Kinda sorta.

96. Lied in the last 24 hours?
I hope not. You know where liars go.

95. What is your current ring tone?
Vibrate.

94. Where was the last place you took a plane to?
Back to NZ from the USA.

93. What is the last movie you watched, with who?
Ace Ventura with the people I love.

92. What makes you extreamly mad?
When people do things to make me mad on purpose.

91. Name?
Sam.

90. The real thing or synthetic? (ex: diamonds, pearls)
Well, funny thing is I have a lot of fake jewelry that I love, but my friend Jesse says I should wear more of the real stuff. 'If only I had the money,' I said to him. Then he said something nice about buying me some if I paid him in hugs. I must give pretty darn good hugs to deserve diamonds. =).

89. Where was your first job?
I don't count a paper run as a 'first job' so it was when I was working at a hair salon getting paid slightly under the table so I didn't have to pay tax.

88. Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?
Yes, I have a few. Shaun, Dan, DG, Calvin etc.

87. Have you ever used a tanning bed?
Nah, man.

86. What are you doing?
Listening to the banter going on around me.

85. long hair or short hair on the opposite sex?
Longish.

84. What does the 7th message in your inbox say on your phone?
Probably something along the lines of "Sam, I think you're awesome and I love you."

83. favorite color to wear?
Red. And yellow or brown. They make me look tan as.

82. What is sitting to your right right now?
My camara.

81.What is sitting to your left right now?
A stapler.

80. Do you have any kids?
Not technically.

79. Who is the 5th person you got a missed call from on your cell phone?
I don't know. Probably Mom.

78. What is the closest black object to you?
The keyboard I'm typing on.

77. Where was your first kiss?
It will be on the altar. It will be amazing, just you wait.

76. What song are you listening to?
'Sacrifice' as Dan sings/records it.

75. Do you sing in the shower?
When I have a song in my head. I really want to get one of those shower radio/CD players. They sound like fun. Then I'd sing in there a lot more. To Relient K most probably.

74. When you go to dances, do you dance?
Yes. That's why it's called a 'dance'

73. What is your favorite TV Show?
The Nanny and SCRUBS!!!!

72. Last time you listened to country music?
Too long ago.

71. Describe your toothbrush.
Well, it has a handle and some bristles. It kinda resembles a toothbrush, believe it or not.

70. Are you easily amused.
Very much so.

69. What brand of shampoo do you use?
It's called something weird. Don't remember.

68. Who did you steal this from and did you bother to read their answers?
A bulliton. I'm reading them as I'm deleting them.

67. How many drugs are in your system?
None.

66. Who cuts your hair?
Whoever can be bothered.

65. What are you wearing?
Tank and shorts.

64. Last person to comment you?
I don't remember.

63. Do you sing?
I sure do. That's why I'm here today.

62. Screamo or country?
Country.

61. Rock or rap?
Rock.

60. Do you like cheese?
Sure do.

59. Who did you last call?
Tisha's grandma I think.

58.Have you ever had a crush on someone much older?
Uh, never more than a couple of years older.

57. What jewelry do you wear daily?
My purity ring.

56. Do you brush your teeth everyday?
Every day twice a day.

55. Who was the last person you hugged?
DG I think.

54. Name the most random thing in your bedroom?
A flower that sings "I'm Walking On Sunshine"

53. What is your favorite Disney Movie?
Beauty and the Beast.

52. Have you ever been pulled over?
Nope.

51. What do you smell?
Stuffyness.

50. Is anything bothering you right now?
Not really. I'm in a pretty good mood!!

49.What are you doing tommorow?
Recording group vocals probably.

48. Do you like gameshows?
Not really.

47. What is your strongest subject in school?
Drama. Fo Shor.

46. Are you a teacher’s pet?
HA! Only when I feel like it.

45. How many products do you use on your hair daily?
Um. None. I like to wake up and go.

44. Color of your room walls?
Off-white.

43. Do you love someone?
Jesus

42. How often do you shave your legs?
Once every few days.

41. What was your first movie to watch in theaters?
Probably the Lion King. And I went back 11 times...

39. Can you swim?
Let's just say that when I race at swimming sports at school my motto is "Don't worry about winning-just DON'T DROWN!!"

38. When was your first family death experience and who?
Umm...I think the first one I could remember was when my Aunt Naomi died from a car accident.

37. Can you handle little kids?
I love them!

36. When was your last kiss?
Just now. Ruth kissed my cheek. It was lovely. =)

35. United States or Canada?
USA

34. What toothpaste do you use?
COLGATE!!!!

33. What do you want right now?
Ice cream. But I can't have any cuz we're recording singing today and I don't wanna mess up my voice...

32. Jeans or sweatpants?
Jeans.

31. What should you be doing?
Finishing this quiz..

30. Are you going to do it?
I'll think about it... =)

29. Do you have socks on?
No. And my feet are resting on a trash can.

28. Do you cook?
I sure can, but I'm better at baking.

27. Do you like your sibling’s friends?
Yeah, I liked Sara's bridesmaids. Especially Mel, she was real fun.

26. Do you like techno?
Yeah man! Rave!!

25. Do you like to tell jokes or listen to them?
Listen. Jokes get lame when I tell them. I'm more likely to do something stupid or weird and get laughs than to sit down and tell jokes. I love laughing!!

24. Do you like seeing the opposite sex in a cowboy/girl hat?
I like seeing everyone in cowboy hats. They're awesome!!

23. IF you could be an animal, what would you be?
Some kind of horse.

22. What is your favorite ethnic dish?
Fajitas.

21. What Place are you dying to visit?
GA, so I can hold my baby niece and nephew.

20. Have you ever lied to a friend?
Yeah. Not so proud of it. Lying isn't good for you.

19. Who is your #1 hotty list?
I can have a list of #1s????!!! Does that even make sense??

18. Do you like '80s movies?
Haha, some are actually pretty cool.

17. Do you like "Pour some sugar on me" by Def Leppard?
Never heard of it...

16. Do you like to dance?
Yes, I do.

15. What kind of music do you like?
I love music.

14. What movie would you recommend to anyone?
Transformers.

13. What is your favorite movie quote?
"It should take you exactly four seconds to cross from here to that door. I'll give you two." --From 'Breakfast at Tiffany's'

12. Been to London?
No I haven't. I'm not even sure I'd want to go.

11. Can you lick your toe?
Wait, let me try...yes. It's amazing.

10. Can you hear me now?
Uhh...no...

9. Been to college?
Nope.

8. What is your favorite cereal?
Cinnamin Crunch

7. Favorite time of day?
Anything but mornings.

6. Ever licked someone's cheek?
Yes...what, is that weird or something?

5. What is something you’re obsessed with?
Making sure the front and back doors are locked at night.

4. What song is always on your head?
Silent night. And most recently the drum solo in our version of Better Than Life.

3. What are you looking forward to?
The album release party!! That means it's finished and ready for people to listen to it.

2. Ever got lost in the dark?
Yes. Even just walking around my house in the dark.

1. What’s your worst fear?
Tsunamis and things like that.

2008-01-10T17:22:00.000-08:00

Recording is so much fun. I'm in love with hearing my guitar being played on the computer over and over and we add more things to the song. To be honest, I didn't think that would happen, cuz I usually hate hearing my performance pieces being re-played at school. I guess we'll see how I feel after recording my voice...

I'm so incredibly tired. We went to pick up Sarah from the airport this morning [[us being Shaun, Elliot and me]] and they got in at about 3.40am. For some reason I get this weird feeling in my stomache after having coffee for the rest of the day and I'm hungry. But I can't motivate myself enough to get up and get food. I also need to re-write some letters and send them off to America. Again, there's not a good enough motivation.

Recording is the man.

That's about all I have to say. I'm really just blogging because I have nothing better to do, but the problem is: I'm too tired to actually talk about anything interesting.

So...sorry.

2008-01-04T23:41:00.000-08:00

Apparently I love ruth. I'm not sure why. I mean, she's such an awesome girl and stuff but we're so incredibly different.

This sounds mean, but hear me out.

We have hardly anything in common. For instance she is very very girly. But I suppose that's why I like her so much. She keeps me entertained and makes me laugh at the most unexpected things. Like how she'll run away from bugs and scream when they're about 1000000th her size. Haha, makes me smile just thinking about it.

Or how gansta she is, while she is so white. However, she DID teach me a few things while I stayed at her house for a week. Even though I was the one who taught myself how to Soulja Boy dance...[[I'll put it in at the bottom of the blog so you also can learn this highly gangsta and tiring dance for yourself!]]

It truely is a strange phenomenon. I just don't understand it. All I know is I have this weird undying love for her as a friend.

Possibly because of her love for life and her bouts of energy. I love how I can open up to her about anything because she's not scared of opening up her heart to me.

That's pretty much all I wanted to say..

Here's that Soulja Boy thing... =) For all you gangstas out there.

2008-01-03T22:50:00.000-08:00

Today Mom and I went to see a very interesting movie called Bella I don't think I have ever cried so much in a movie theatre.

I definitely recommend it. A lovely pro-life movie that promotes the idea that love can come in many forms, not just romantic but also as deep friendship. Bella.

Anyways, in other news, I'm trying to think up a list of foods that I can make tonight and bring along to recording since I'm camping out in the building for a whole week. I'm not so keen on going to the dairy every day. My money will simply disappear.

Which brings me to another piece of news. I finally was bothered enough to go down to a local cafe and ask for a job. I gave them my details and things, so hopefully I'll get a call soonish. And hopefully they won't mind me not working through Parachute weekend...

I promise I'll find my list of ideas that I wanted to videoblog about until I came to my senses and remembered I had a blog already. Then this will be so much more interesting. Promise. =).

Happy 2008!

2008-01-02T16:44:00.000-08:00

Well 2007 is over and I've decided to return to my blog page after months and months of forgetfulness and not botheredness.

I love how I can add 'ness' to the end of pretty much any adjective and it makes sense in my head.

So 2007 was a pretty good year. A lot of things happened concerning school and youth group and friends. Here are some of the things that happened. Good and bad:

-Summerstock. Still fun even though I was sick and not in a good mood pretty much the entire time. That's how youth group works with me. It's ALWAYS fun.

-Then I saw my sister and brother-in-law off at the airport. I miss them.

-Parachute 07. A very good time. The usual madness happened with waterfights and late nights and surprisingly the best night was the last night when it was raining and Dain, Jesse and I got to hang out for ages and even snuck into the Supporta's Cafe (where it was dry) and fell asleep on the couches. Good times.

-I became an aunt on the 7th of Feb when my nephew Cole was born. He was a huge 10.5LB!!

-School started. The next week was my sweet 16th birthday and I didn't end up doing anything special for it besides going out to Mexican with my rents and Tisha and Sarah.

-I GOT MY BRACES OFF!!!

-MXPX CONCERT--WAS THE MAN!!

-I joined the soccer team and was made captain of the 2nd XI even though I'd never played before...we one all our games bar one. Even a ''friendly'' game against the 1st XI. Cuz that's how we roll.

-Went through a weird depressed stage that no one really seemed to realise that I was going through...

-Got over myself.

-Fell in love with the Transformers movie. SEQUEL?!?!

-Bloom toga party was a highlight. That was a fun night. Anytime that you sit on the floor and eat healthy food off a low table mediterranian style with good company is fun!

-I became an auntie again when Acca was born on August 19th at 7.15LB.

-Was the prompt in our senior production of Pride and Prejudice.

-Went to my first prom through youth group with my friend Jesse.

-Had the most embarrassing moment so far in my 16 year old life concerning a certain dance and a chicken fillet that wasn't mine... =). Still makes me go red...

-Ate ostridge with Jake.

-Missions week.

-Uh...I'll say nothing except a joke..."Q: what's the difference between the All Blacks and a teabag? A: A teabag stays in the cup longer!"

-Started getting driving lessons.

-Open mic night where I played my own song that wasn't really finished. Sarah F and I also did our versions of some of Pheb's songs from 'Friends' Such as 'Smelly Cat' and the christmas song.

-Went to Taupo and stayed in a ***** hotel with the Thomas family.

-Didn't do Christmas. Instead we went up north as a family and stayed with the Thomas family.

And that's pretty much it. Not a bad year all in all. This year looks pretty exciting with the new school year coming up (I've decided I hate High School, actually. But I'll blog about that some other time...) and in a couple of days I'm recording a worship CD with some youth group friends. And so many more things but this blog is long enough as it is.

You know you've been an IHOP intern if...

2007-04-17T18:24:00.000-07:00

You know you've been an IHOP intern if...

...you've shown up at someone's wedding wearing your name tag (or you wore it during filming for a DVD)

.…you sway left and right at the checkout line.

…you've used the word "intense" to describe something that was clearly not 'intense'.

…you've lived in KC for 5 years and still have your old drivers license.

…you've been ruined.

…you've ever rocked in front of computer.

…end every email with 'bless you' followed by your initials.

…you don't know anyone that's actually from Kansas City.

…you've had DeAnna cut your hair.

…you know what a puff is.

…you don't understand why somewhere doesn't have wireless.

…you write entire e-mail messages in the subject box.

…you've ever helped with the CEC and STI over at FSM during an EGS or FCF service just before the GBF

…you ever contemplated shaving your head and buying trendy glasses.

… you feel empty without a nalgene in one hand and a grande coffee in the other.

…when you always associate colors with the highlighted themes in your Bible (ex: blue car = think of end times)

…you own a pen pouch.

...you've probably had caleb powell work on one of your vehicles on at least one occassion… if you own one.

...after having been at ihop for at least a few months you - 1)get a tatoo 2) get some type of piercing 3) change your hair color

...can use a misty chorus for almost anything…. "does anyone know what tiiiiime it is?"

...change your name in some way to demonstrate the reality of what's going on in your heart or to get back to the biblical meaning. For instance: You were always known as Dan before… but now it's 'Daniel'.

...You somehow end up sounding like Dwayne, Allen, or Mike when on the prayer mike - whether you're male or female.

...It's normal to meet someone, date them, get engaged to them, and get married within a 3 month time period.

...worship at an FCF service seems ridiculously short because it ONLY lasts an hour.

...IHOPers think that "Amen" is always followed by "Let's stand."

…It's normal to see people wearing the same clothes in the morning that you saw them wearing the previous evening (night watch, not bad hygiene)

…You've had someone accidentally say "good night" to you as you get out of your car at 6am.

…You see someone with gray or white hair and think they must be a Simeon

…Age 30 is "old"

…You say "no, totally" when you agree with something. (thanks DWAYNE)

…You have to buy Asics running shoes to protect your feet from all the pacing in the prayer room.

…You time everything in two-hour incriments. Better yet, you associate time with what SET it is instead of the actual time. (Intercession just ended… time for lunch!)

...If you own a apple product.

...Your prayer language has a ro-bo-bo-bo-sho in it or you roll your r's

Oh, IHOP. I love you.

Please send this to all the former and current IHOP interns that you know.

Easter Camp 07

2007-04-12T21:13:00.000-07:00

I suppose I should type out something about EC07.

It was certainly an interesting time. The worship was amazing. It was that type of worship that you kind of expect when you go to a conference or maybe City on a Hill. I can only describe it as loud and a little hyped up. The lead singer from my favourite swing band Late 80's Mercedes was the worship leader. So that was cool.

The meetings themselves were pretty hyped up, as you can expect when about 3300 teenagers are sitting in the same room. We had Tribal Wars where they split the Paladium (they called it the Pavillion, but I'll never get over Paladium.) into three sections; Stealth (yes, I thought of Caleb every time. And because I thought of Caleb, I lost. Haha, now you lost!! Hahahaha.), Recon (our tribe in the middle) and Cobolt. I believe Stealth won. (I lost). Recon lost. (I haven't stopped losing yet, have you??)

The speakers were amazing. The theme of the camp was Love Wins (as I posted about earlier). This one guy, Mic Nugget (as he was affectionatly called) Made a really interesting speech on Sunday morning about loving people as Jesus would love them. This basically means loving the unlovable. Think about it. Jesus loved the prostitutes and tax collectors, not just his disciples and the rabbis. This was a hard pill to swallow for me. Especially when he told a story of this woman talking to a young girl who wanted an abortion. Instead of trying to talk her out of it and threaten to tell her parents, as I probably would have done, this lady simply told the girl that she would be there for her after the abortion. She did this because it was the more loving way to go about it. The reason the girl couldn't go to her parents was because she was scared she would get kicked out of her "Christian" home because she was pregnant. If this lady had tried to talk her out of it, she would have been showing about as much support as what the parents were. None.

The rest of the story went that the girl decided against the abortion because she felt like she actually had support from someone. Her parents, of course found out and did end up throwing her out. So the girl went to the lady, because she knew she would be loved there. Because the girl had been thrown out of her parent's house, she no longer had funding for college (uni). The lady not only provided a roof over the girl and her baby's head and food and everything else, she also sacrificed stuff in her life to pay the rest of the girl's way through college.

That's love at it's finest. And suprisingly hard to live up to.

That was just one part of one amazing serman from the weekend.

So that was really good. Not a lot of the rest of the weekend was very interesting. Although I really enjoyed some of the little things going on, such as the swing party with Lt. Funk. I put on my Belle skirt and had a lot of fun. I found Jesse at the beginning and showed him my skirt (I really like this skirt.) Maybe I should explain about the skirt. I found it at the school gala. It's not the nicest color, green, but I thought it would be good for Darby stuff. However, when I tried it on, I discovered it was one of those beautiful skirts that fly out when you twirl, but doesn't go so high that you see unmentionables. So anyways, I was showing Jesse and, being a ballroom dancer, offered to help me make it really twirl good. Talk about fun.

This other guy, I don't know his name still, is an amazing dancer. I'm really not good at ballroom. It's really boxed and if you make a mistake, it's noticable. Even after I explained this he still asked me to dance. He was such a good leader. I could see him rolling his eyes every once in a while when I stood on his toe or something, but it was actually really fun.

Oh, and I made a new friend from Kumeu. Her name is Monique. The only nice Monique I've ever had the pleasure to meet. Her birthday was over the weekend and she was just really sweet.

There were a few other really good times, but this blog is getting way too long, so I should just leave it.

Tonight's Crazy Worship Set.

2007-04-03T03:45:00.000-07:00

It all started in worship. Elliot and Gemma were leading and towards the end it all got quiet. I was on my knees at this point, thinking about the cross cuz we had just been singing 'God of all Splendour'. Then Dan starts talking about repentance and how he felt we needed to get on our knees before God and just repent and give all our guilt to God.

After a little while he got up and gave a little speech, mainly saying that he had planned something really cool, but the Holy Spirit had some other plans, so we'd go with that. People started getting up and giving testimonys of some cool things that had recently happened involving God. Some really neat stuff was said but things really started getting good when the Fabrin sisters got up and were talking about the Essence Conference and this weird as gold that had been appearing on their hands. They asked who wanted some and, not sure if I really believed it could be real, I put my hand up.

Sarah came and prayed for me and sure enough, I looked down and saw some sparkles on my hands. I wiped them on my jeans to make sure that I wasn't just seeing shiny sweat. The sparkles remained. As cool as that was, I just got the feeling that I should get on my knees and give my hands to God. This was because we had been learning about Bach in music. Bach was the type of guy that would pray in tongues before doing anything, just to make sure he was doing it for God. I decided I wanted to be like this with my hands. I use my hands for many things. Some main ones are playing guitar and praying for people. I really want to be a blessing through my hands, so I was praying that God would use me through my hands.

It was cool cuz a whole bunch of people came over to pray for me. My forehead started to twitch uncontrollably and then my mouth. My teeth were chattering and I couldn't stop it. Then someone starts laughing. Really loud and hard. Not just any laughter though. Holy laughter. It started spreading around the room and soon I had caught it too. When most of the people around me had left to pray for someone else or because they had caught it themselves, I got up to the front where the most people were laughing. From there I couldn't stop rolling around for about an hour. Crazy stuff!

Love Wins--Theme for Easter Camp07

2007-04-01T02:33:00.000-07:00

Love Wins.
It’s the highest cause in all humanity.
It’s our universal commonality.
It’s our most divine need.
It’s the commodity we trade for security and identity.
It’s the language of Hope, and the fingerprint of Justice.

Love Wins.
Love seeks no other agenda.
Love is God’s supernatural territory.
Love is a spiritual force not a trivial human thought.
Love always pursues the good.
Love is unconditional and abundant.

Love Wins.
Love doesn’t have to fit the Law because Love is the ultimate fulfillment of the Law.
Love breaks the bonds of the broken and the oppressed.
Love doesn’t want payback, doesn’t ask for reciprocation and never holds back.
Love is the motivation of justice, the power behind hope, the fuel of forgiveness.
Love pursues, Love trusts, Love hopes, Love gives, Love stands strong, Love never fails.

Love Wins. (the Gospel)
Jesus is the ultimate expression of God’s love.
His life was an example of Love lived out. He demonstrated compassion, justice and hope for the broken and hungry as well as the faithful. He never failed in bringing the light of God’s Love in every situation. (Romans 13:8-10)
8 Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law. 9 The commandments, "Do not commit adultery," "Do not murder," "Do not steal," "Do not covet," and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: "Love your neighbour as yourself." 10 Love does no harm to its neighbour. Therefore love is the fulfilment of the law. (NIV)
8-10 Don't run up debts, except for the huge debt of love you owe each other. When you love others, you complete what the law has been after all along. The law code—don't sleep with another person's spouse, don't take someone's life, don't take what isn't yours, don't always be wanting what you don't have, and any other "don't" you can think of—finally adds up to this: Love other people as well as you do yourself. You can't go wrong when you love others. When you add up everything in the law code, the sum total is love. (The Message)
He willingly was led to death on our behalf, to reconcile human beings to God and one another. His death was the perfect fulfillment of God’s plan for restoration.

Love Wins. (Social Justice)
We don’t live a half-strength decaf trim latte flavoured Gospel. We don’t exist in a framework of vanilla-bland Truth, we don’t live with a powerless Hope. True Justice, Hope and Freedom comes when we genuinely learn to love one another, and learn to forgive. When we learn to live in the light and willingly bring the light to others. When we learn to love one another, saved or not, without any other agenda than Love itself. This is God’s love and mercy, shown to one another. (Isaiah 58:6-12)
6 "Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? 7 Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? 8 Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard. 9 Then you will call, and the LORD will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I. "If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk, 10 and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday. 11 The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. 12 Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

I am a Christian poem.

2007-03-28T03:15:00.000-07:00

I am a Christian.
When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin." I'm whispering "I was lost, " Now I'm found and forgiven.
When I say..."I am a Christian" I don't speak of this with pride. I'm confessing that I stumble and need CHRIST to be my guide.
When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not trying to be strong. I'm professing that I'm weak and need HIS strength to carry on.
When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not bragging of success. I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess.
When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not claiming to be perfect, My flaws are far too visible but, God believes I am worth it.
When I say... "I am a Christian" I still feel the sting of pain, I have my share of heartaches So I call upon His name.
When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not holier than thou, I'm just a simple sinner who received God's good grace, somehow..
Author ~Maya Angelou Stay up to all those who are hurting and lost. God is Good. He has a plan for your life that is beyond what your mind can comprehend. Don't take it from me. Take it from the Man upstairs and his living word, the Bible. Ephesians 4:20-22